Taking Care of Business: Tips for New Moms Returning to Work After Maternity Leave
The transition back to work after maternity leave can be challenging, bringing many different emotions and changes to the forefront. From not feeling ready to be apart from your baby to feeling guilty for time spent at work, it can be incredibly overwhelming for the first few days, weeks, or even months. Whether you want to go back to work or have to go back out of necessity, it takes time to adjust and figure out a rhythm for you and your family. Here are some practical tips to consider as you prepare to return to work.
1. Take a deep breath (or several) and take a moment to offer yourself kindness and compassion. This feels difficult because it is difficult. Many mothers feel sadness, guilt, resentment, anxiety, and other emotions around this transition. Given that most American women don’t have paid maternity leave or are able to take extended leave, the return to work can feel premature. If you notice difficulty engaging in self-compassion, try talking to yourself as you would a friend or loved one.
2. Enlist your support system. Have you ever known a mother who received the “I transitioned back to work without help and it was a success award”? Me either! We are wired for connection, especially during difficult times, so cash in your IOUs, rain checks, gift cards, and take others up on their offers to help. Seek out support groups for working moms or friends that have also gone through this transition - they are very likely to get it! Additionally, lean on any resources your workplace might offer such as mini-orientations, peer groups, or connect with colleagues who have also returned following maternity leave.
3. Stay in touch with your employer. Prior to going on maternity leave establish a point of contact at work, whether it’s a supervisor or HR representative, who you can touch base with regarding your return. There’s no need to communicate frequently, however it can be helpful to touch base a few weeks before returning to work. Topics that can be helpful to discuss are identifying a return date, changes in roles/responsibilities or schedule, any barriers that may delay coming back to work, and boundaries around business trips, meeting times, or pump breaks.
4. If possible, try to arrange a gradual return to work. Not everyone will have this option, but if you do - take it! By easing in, you will have more time to practice a few dry runs of your morning routine and make adjustments. Even if you work from home, this can help you feel more prepared and allow your little one to adjust as well. This may mean working half days a few days per week or scheduling your return date on a Wednesday, Thursday, or Friday. If you can start your baby with childcare in advance, take extra time to yourself for self-care.
5. Manage expectations. It’s one thing to imagine what it’s like to return to work after having a baby and another thing to actually do it. Be realistic with what you’re able to do the first few weeks back at work. Keep in mind that your little one might not be sleeping through the night or it might take a while to get the hang of pump breaks if you’re taking those. Communicate with your employer about your needs and continue to check back in if you believe these expectations need to shift. If you consider yourself a high achiever, take some time to acknowledge that you are a very different person than you were before you went on maternity leave.
Adjusting to being a working mother requires a combination of checking in with yourself and making micro-adjustments - it’s a process!
If you’re interested in additional support as you return to work, let’s talk! Learn more about working with me or my upcoming virtual group, Returning to Work After Maternity Leave, open to mothers who are located in North Carolina, Virginia, and South Carolina.
